If I could ask God for anything, it would be for Him to put in me the desire to fully crave Him, and long to know Him more. I get very distracted from Him all of the time and I wander off more often than any other sheep I have met! I put in a half-effort from time to time to learn more, but I want so badly to just CRAVE God as if nothing else at all mattered! Because, if we stop and think about it, nothing else does matter...
Why is it that I can't just get completely overtaken by the urge to seek God and to know him intimately? Why is it that I can never stay motivated to learn more about Him, and talk to Him more? Does prayer change things? Does that even matter? I just want to speak with my creator, forget asking for anxiety to go away, forget asking for things around me to change. I don't even want to care about that! I just want to TALK with God for the sake of TALKING, for the sake of growing closer to Him.
David worded what I am feeling, because he was feeling it too! I don't know if he was only feeling it because he was in the desert heat or if he always felt this way but he says, "O God, you are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water."
I want to feel that way all of the time! That is my prayer. That is what I want more than anything. Here is a secular song that I think really sums up how I feel about wanting to feel about God:
